Magic's Muse Read online

  “It was four years ago.” Will shrugged. “I’m being foolish, and your brother has already done more than enough.”

  “I spoke to him of it a few months ago.” Cathal remembered well the determination in his brother’s eyes, the stubborn tilt of his chin, and the indignation at the suggestion that perhaps some quests were not meant to be won. “He still spends time each day focusing on the lock of hair you gave him.”

  Will’s hand went to the locket he wore hidden under his shirt. Inside was another lock of hair, two dark strands wound together, one belonging to his wife, the other to his son. “He has not given up, then, but perhaps I have.” He folded the sketch carefully and put it into his pocket.

  “You haven’t given up, or you wouldn’t be talking to me about this.” Cathal shook his head. “Although some quests are not easily won, it doesn’t mean that they should be forsaken either.” Tomas had showed him that. “Allow yourself a little hope, Will, and if you find that too difficult, at least cherish these memories. Watch your son grow, even if it is just in dreams.”

  “Perhaps. Or maybe it’s time to follow those dreams, rather than just be content with glimpses of something that otherwise will never be.” There was something in Will’s tone that made Cathal’s head come up with a start.

  “Going through the portal now would be dangerous, Will.” Did he have the right to say such a thing to Will? Surely if the chance was there he should be allowed to take it? “Promise me that you will not attempt it. If Irene closes it at the moment you pass through, you could be trapped between our world and this one.” There were stories told of tormented spirits unable to find rest and doomed to wander between worlds for eternity. Cathal shivered at the thought of never being able to touch or be held again. It was not a fate he’d wish on anyone, not even his worst enemy.

  “I have to know whether there is a chance that this is real.” Will glanced out the window at the tree. Its leaves glistened, dew already starting to fall with the late afternoon shadows. “You risked everything for Tomas. Why shouldn’t I be able to do the same for my son?” He glared at Cathal. “I never took you for a hypocrite, Master Cathal.”

  Cathal winced at the honorific. “I’m not saying you should do nothing, Will.” He leaned over and placed his hand over Will’s. Will pulled free of it. “You know as well as I that although several days have passed here, the same cannot be said for Rhosynoak. Even if you pass through safely, Deryn would kill you as soon as you appeared on the other side.” As much as it pained him to admit it, Will was of no use to Deryn. Worse still, he’d betrayed her by pretending to be a trusted servant. She would ensure his death was neither short nor pleasant. “You’re of no use to Gerrant if you are dead.”

  “Then what would you have me do?” Will pushed the chair back and walked over to the window. “I am as trapped by this enchantment as you and Christian.” His shoulders shook. He wrapped his arms around himself. “I have no future here, nor do I have a past. I am a man out of my rightful place, although I’m no longer sure what that is. All I see is shadows, a twilight of neither one nor the other.”

  “I wish I had answers for you, my friend.” Cathal joined Will at the window, placing a gentle hand on his friend’s shoulder. “Would you allow me to talk to Mikey about this?” If they could at least figure out exactly what Mikey’s ability was, then they’d have a better idea as to whether Will’s dreams were a glimpse of a reality for the moment out of reach, or just the hopes of a man who still grieved for whom he’d lost.

  “Talk to him.” Will didn’t turn around to answer, or move, but instead kept looking out the window. “I will wait a few days and hope it is not too late. If this portal closes, perhaps there is another.”

  “Perhaps,” Cathal said softly. Or maybe it was the only one, and by waiting they risked closing their only way back forever.

  Something glinted in the distance, a shiny green out of place against the row of trees lining the driveway. The sound of an engine grew louder, gravel protesting against the tires disturbing its resting place.

  A cat meowed, and then another. Christian sauntered across the driveway, coming to a stop by the edge of the hedge, positioning himself for a decent view. Merlin followed closely behind, skidding into Christian and receiving a glare for her trouble.

  Cathal stepped back from the window. A look passed between him and Will. This conversation would not be mentioned again until Cathal had spoken to Mikey.

  The car came closer, finally coming to a stop outside the front door of the inn. Cathal ran a hand through his hair and swallowed hard. Ethan was Tomas’s closest friend, one of the few he’d allowed to see a glimpse of the person he really was before coming to Crossroads Inn. This meeting was an important one.

  For a moment he felt very unsure of himself and of everything that had happened. Tomas had said his friend was a teacher of science who valued facts above supposition. That was not a description of someone who believed in magic. Donovan and Heidi, although also of this world, at least seemed open to the idea of it.

  “At least you’re not being presented to his parents, Cathal,” Will said dryly. “Or he to yours.”

  “My parents will have to accept him for who he is,” Cathal snapped. Tomas had lost his parents in an accident when he was a child. “I love him, and it is my opinion that matters.”

  Will chuckled. “Then take your own advice, my friend.” He pushed Cathal toward the front door, following closely behind. Will would want to see this particular meeting for himself. “Tomas loves you. You’re good for him, Cat, and any friend of Tomas’s would see that. Now get out there and introduce yourself to this Ethan.” He grinned. “At the very least it will be good practice for meeting your future husband’s sister in a few days’ time.”

  Chapter 10

  DESPITE Will’s insistence, Cathal hovered by the front door, rather than walking out to the car, preferring to get his first look at Ethan from a safe distance. This was ridiculous. It wasn’t as though he wasn’t experienced in such matters, with the number of times his uncle had presented him at court and expected him to hold his own in conversation with complete strangers.

  But Ethan wasn’t a stranger, at least not to Tomas, and because of that this meeting was an important one.

  Cathal wiped his damp palms down his jeans and took a step toward the car. Will grinned but said nothing. Now was probably not the best time to remind him of just how nervous he’d been when asking Amelia’s parents for her hand in marriage. Christian had plied their friend with several strong ales just to get him onto their lands.

  “You could challenge him to a duel, if it came down to it,” Will whispered in Cathal’s ear. “Although, of course, one hopes that might not be necessary.”

  “I have no intention of doing anything of the sort.” Cathal snorted at the idea but was also amused by it. Either they would become friends, or they would not.

  “Of course not.” The side of Will’s mouth twitched.

  “You have spent far too much time in the company of my cousin,” Cathal pointed out, relieved that Christian could not join in and offer his opinion on the subject.

  “Perhaps, but at least you no longer give the impression of one going to meet his death, my friend.” Will grinned. “If you need a second, I am your humble servant.”

  “Never humble and never a servant, Will,” Cathal corrected, his attention drawn to the man who had just climbed out of the car.

  Ethan was tall, although still a fraction shorter than Tomas. He was also slender like his friend, but not overly so. His dark hair was cut short, the ends of it curling up against the back of his neck. He was dressed in jeans, which seemed to be the predominant fashion in this world. The dress jacket over his buttoned-through shirt wouldn’t have been out of place during the time of Cathal’s last visit. He looked around, very obviously searching for someone or something. An almost-not-quite smile appeared on his lips when he saw Cathal and Will. He closed the distance between them quickly and held out his hand to Cathal. “You must be Cathal. I’ve heard a lot about you from both Tomas and Donovan.” His voice had a somewhat harsh timbre to it, deep but not unnaturally so. “I’m Ethan Leavitt.”

  “Cathal Emerys.” Cathal returned the firm handshake, his tone polite, as was Ethan’s. Intense brown eyes met his, looking him up and down and not hiding the fact he was doing so. He felt nervous, almost on edge, as though he was as nervous about this meeting as Cathal was.

  “You can leave the third degree till later, Ethan.” Donovan walked over, sliding his arm around Ethan’s waist. “You’ve already grilled Tomas in the car.” He grinned. “Be nice, or we’ll have to have words later.”

  “That sounds more like a promise than a threat.” Ethan visibly relaxed in Donovan’s presence, subtly leaning into his partner’s loose embrace.

  “It’s whatever you want it to be.” Donovan’s grin grew wider.

  “And you have the nerve to tell me and Cat to get a room.” Tomas greeted Cathal with a brief kiss. “Don’t mind Ethan, love. He’s not great on tact at times. The only reason he’s being polite now is that he’s trying to impress Donovan.” The comment earned him a glare from Ethan.

  “Keep encouraging him to do that if you want,” Donovan said. “I’m all for it, although I’m already impressed by him.” Ethan mumbled something under his breath and blushed. He caught Donovan’s hand in his, their fingers intertwining. Donovan kissed Ethan lightly and whispered something in his ear, whatever it was causing Ethan’s color to darken even more.

  Will laughed. “The greeting customs of this world are definitely very different from ours. I’m Will Hernesford. It is good to finally meet you, Mr. Leavitt.”

  “Ethan, please. Mr. Leavitt reminds me that I have a classroom of t
eenagers using that name to look forward to in another week.” Ethan’s attention shifted toward Will. “You came back through that so-called portal with Tomas, if all of this is to be believed.” Donovan’s fingers tightened around Ethan’s, and he sighed. “I’m sorry. That didn’t quite come out as I’d intended.”

  “Yes, it did.” Cathal felt a warning hand on his arm. Upsetting Tomas’s friend upon their first meeting would not be a good idea, but this was a man whose manner suggested he preferred directness over false politeness. “I don’t hold it against you, although I realize all of this has the appearance of fiction rather than the truth it is.”

  To his surprise, Ethan chuckled. “I never thought I’d see the day that Tomas would be the one urging politeness. That in itself impresses me.” He ignored the glare Tomas sent his way. “Don’t bother trying to convince me you’re polite, Tomas. I’ve known you for too long and know that only happens when you have enough motivation to make it worth your while.”

  There was a moment’s silence, and then Tomas laughed. “I’ve missed you too, Ethan.” From his reaction, this appeared to be the way the conversation often went between him and his friend. Cathal had a sudden vision of his cousin amongst this mix of personalities and couldn’t stop the groan that escaped him.

  Will caught his eye and grinned. As if on cue, a familiar black shape sauntered over, settled into the space between the two couples, and began to wash himself. Cathal rolled his eyes. At the very least his cousin could pretend to be subtle about the fact he was taking stock of Ethan, but that had never been one of Christian’s strengths in human form either. It was foolish to think this would be any different.

  “Is that…?” Ethan had noticed the cat too. He stared at it.

  “Yep.” Donovan bent down to pet the cat. Christian’s tail jerked up once, then twice, to show his disdain of the action before he retreated to a safe distance, still staring at Ethan. “This is Christian, previously known as Blackthorn to those of us who had no clue that the cat wasn’t actually a cat.” He gave Cathal a pointed look.

  “If I’d told you, would you have believed me?” Cathal shrugged. The longer Christian was in this form, the more his annoyance grew at being treated like the animal he appeared to be. Cathal had attempted to speak to him about it, to reassure his cousin that he, at least, did not see him as such, but all he’d got for his trouble was a disgusted meow.

  “Probably not,” Donovan admitted, “but there are days when I’m not sure whether I believe that part even now, despite the fact there are witnesses and all that.”

  “He’s not that much different when he’s human,” Tomas said, “except that in this form you’re spared all the snark and so-called wit.”

  “Tomas!” Why couldn’t he see the comment would only serve to worsen Christian’s frustration? “Once my cousin is in human form again, I swear I am going to lock the pair of you in a room and make you sort out your differences.”

  “Like that’s going to happen,” Tomas snorted. “I know he’s your cousin, Cat, but Alice was right. You guys are like chalk and cheese.”

  “Can I watch?” The grin wiped off Will’s face quickly when Cathal glared at him. “My apologies, Cat, but I know how Christian can be when he’s in one of his moods.”

  “I can arrange for you to be on the end of one of mine if you’d like!” Christian rubbed around Cathal’s legs and purred. The sooner this enchantment was broken, the better. He felt so tired. It was becoming more of an effort to find the energy to ignore comments he would have normally brushed to one side. They niggled at him, in much the same way the enchantment did, with his awareness of his tether to the tree growing stronger each day. His hand went to his throat, and he swallowed, taking several deep breaths to remind himself he could still breathe. It was his fault Christian was in this form, the nature of the spell taunting him, a reminder of everything they’d fought for and lost.

  “Cat?” Tomas spoke softly, concerned.

  “My apologies, Will.” Cathal pulled himself up sharply. Will was a good friend, and had enough of his own troubles without Cathal adding his to the mix. “This situation weighs on all of us.”

  Will shrugged. “It’s fine, Cat. I only spoke in jest. Christian is a close friend, but that doesn’t mean that I am unaware of how either of you can be at times, especially with the difficulty of our current circumstances.” His hand rested on his pocket for a moment, his eyes unfocused. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I think I will take Buttercup out for a ride. She could do with the exercise.” He looked at Cathal, as if waiting for permission.

  “I cannot give her what she needs. I would be grateful if you did.” Will would be able to ride her farther and take her out beyond the leash to which Cathal was bound. Without the proper exercise, the horse would be happy eating apples and growing plump. She’d always had that tendency.

  “Tell Heidi that I will return before supper.” Will nodded politely and turned to head toward the stable. Christian meowed, giving Cathal what could only be a questioning look before scampering after Will.

  “What did you guys talk about while we were gone?” Tomas stared after Will, frowning. “And don’t tell me it was nothing. I swear sometimes he talks as much in riddles as you do.”

  “I no longer speak in riddles, Tomas,” Cathal reminded him, a little stiffly. He sighed, slipping his hand into that of his betrothed.

  Ethan was looking from one to another, a “what am I missing” expression on his face. It reminded Cathal of the one Tomas often wore. “It’s never a great idea to do that when you’re in a relationship,” he said finally. “It only leads to a bloody mess later. Trust me on that. Been there, done that, didn’t get the T-shirt.”

  “T-shirt?” Cathal would never get used to some of this world’s expressions. “What T-shirt?”

  “It’s just a saying, Cat.” Tomas squeezed Cathal’s hand. “Like the one about not passing go and not collecting two hundred.”

  “Oh.” Donovan had said that the first time he’d caught Cathal and Tomas kissing. Cathal felt himself start to blush.

  Donovan sniggered. “And like the one about getting a room.” Ethan rolled his eyes and smacked Donovan lightly on his backside. “Ouch! There was no need for that. I’m behaving.”

  “Uh huh.” Ethan made a show of looking at his watch. “It’s cold, and we’re still standing out here talking. What happened to the coffee I was promised, and do I have to lug my own bags inside?” There was amusement in his voice, and a good deal of affection. He ruffled Donovan’s hair, planting a kiss on the top of his head. “Tomas has something he wants to talk to Cathal about, and I haven’t seen you in weeks.” He grinned at Tomas and winked. “I figure if they’re going to get a room maybe we should too.”

  CATHAL was relieved when Tomas shut their bedroom door behind them. The room had long been his haven, a safe place to retreat from the outside world. As much as he enjoyed the company of others, he’d grown more solitary over the past few years, although the wish for someone with whom he could share his life had never left him.

  It was quiet here, familiar. The layers of paint hid the original pattern of the wallpaper that still lay underneath for the most part, a glimpse of faded flowers peeking out of forgotten corners. It had to be a coincidence that the room Tomas had been given had once been Cathal’s long ago. He would have suspected Christian’s hand in it, but the influence of a cat only reached so far. He’d lain here in this room, on a bed similar to this, imagining he shared his life with someone he loved. Once or twice when he’d touched himself, he’d dared to pretend that a lover caressed his body and whispered the endearments he longed to hear.

  The reality of it was so much better. The build and release of overwhelming physical and emotional desire he felt with Tomas was something he’d never dreamed possible until that first time they’d made love.

  Tomas embraced him, kissing him slowly, licking Cathal’s lips before breaking the kiss with a smile. “I never get tired of kissing you,” he said softly, running the tip of his thumb over Cathal’s cheek, caressing him gently, almost reverently.